


in the back of my mind (you live all the time)

by notanannoyingfangirl



Series: Sense8 AU [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Sense8 (TV) Fusion, Don't Have to Know Sense8 Canon, F/M, Kylo's a Criminal Defense Lawyer, Minor The Last Jedi spoilers, Psychic Bond, Rey's a Mechanic, They can talk to each other through the powers of their minds, They live on opposite ends of the country - but it's okay!, basically the force bond, just in a modern setting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-30
Updated: 2017-12-30
Packaged: 2019-02-24 02:21:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13203717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notanannoyingfangirl/pseuds/notanannoyingfangirl
Summary: The fourth time that Rey saw him she stopped counting. It was late at night, and she was in bed although she wasn’t asleep. Her apartment was dark, but the air was muggy. A fan whirled in the corner, the red light staring at her like an unblinking eye. The numbers on her digital clock kept rolling past: 1 a.m., 2 a.m., 3 a.m., 4 a.m. until Rey wasn’t sure that even trying to fall asleep would be worth it. She rolled over onto her side, hoping that the change in position would help her be able to calm the restlessness she can feel churning inside of her… inside of him, and found herself staring into his dark eyes. Rey didn't know what time it must have been, for him, in New York. Still, Rey knew without asking that he hadn’t been asleep. He was dressed in slacks and a button-down black dress shirt, and looked startlingly out of place against the backdrop off her off-white studio apartment and the nondescript grey duvet cover that was currently kicked haphazardous off the bed due to the heat. Dark circles stood out from his fair skin, so dark they seemed almost like bruises.also known as the Reylo Sense8 au that no one knew they needed, in which Kylo and Rey discover that they have become psychically connected





	in the back of my mind (you live all the time)

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: And she’s back! Hey guys, so I am back again with another work for another fandom (I just like to keep you on your toes!). This is my first Rey x Kylo Ren | Ben Solo piece, but after seeing The Last Jedi I knew that I couldn’t resist writing a Sense8 au for these two. Please note that this work was inspired by my viewing of The Last Jedi, and even though I did not follow the plot of the movie there are minor spoilers. 
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this piece. I had so much fun writing it that I cranked it out in like three days. At 10,000 words long, this is technically the longest fic that I have written without a co-author.
> 
> As always, I am not claiming that I own any of these characters, or anything related to Star Wars or Sense8. The title of this post is taken from a Fleetwood Mac song.
> 
> If you liked it, please make sure to comment or leave kudos as they always make me smile <3
> 
> Also, find me on Tumblr @notanannoyingfangirl
> 
> \- notanannoyingfangirl

Rey reached forward, grabbing the rough edge of the stone and pulling herself onto the top of the rock formation. She gasped for breath, rolling away from the ledge and onto her back so that she was staring up at the bright blue sky. The Arizona sun beat down, and Rey lifted one of her arms to drape it across her face in an effort to protect her eyes.

After a few minutes of rest, Rey forced herself into a sitting position and pulled a water bottle out of her backpack, guzzling down half of the bottle in two quick swallows.

Rock climbing wasn’t the easiest form of exercise, but she loved the thrill that it gave her when she reached the top. Pushing herself into a standing position, Rey turned and looked out at the view. The red rock formation that she was currently standing atop towered above the surrounding desert. Down below, she could see her jeep where it was parked at the base of the rocks, the white paint was streaked with red sand, the same sand that was currently covering her hands and her clothes from the climb.

In the distance, the horizon seemed to bleed into the sky. One lone dirt road snaked its way across the sand, the tire tracks from where she had swerved off of it to drive across the ground still visible.

The bright light of the sun was making her head pound, the headache that Rey had noticed when she woke up early that morning returning with a vengeance. Cursing herself for not having brought another dose of Advil, Rey dropped back down onto the rough stone, pulling her backpack off and laying it on the ground next to her so that she could lay back down comfortably. She closed her eyes, focusing on evening out her breath. In a few minutes, she would climb back down and return to her jeep, but for now she was content to let the sun burn the skin on her nose.

Or, at least, that was what Rey had been planning to do, but suddenly a large shadow blocked out the light that pierced even her closed eyelids. Rey’s eyes flashed open, and she scrambled to her feet as soon as she noticed the man that was standing over her. He was dressed in all black and was tall with broad shoulders. Rey cursed herself for neglecting to pay attention to her surroundings, wondering how she could have failed to notice the arrival of someone else out here in the wide stretch of nothingness that surrounded her.

The man looked disturbingly out of place, his skin was pale and looked like it hadn’t seen the sun in days, and the black dress shirt and dark jeans that he was wearing were definitely _not_ appropriate clothing for rock climbing. Perhaps most disturbing of all, there was no hint of the red sand that seemed to stick to every inch of Rey’s exposed skin and clothes.

It must be the heat, Rey mused, shaking her head in an effort to clear away the hallucination. However, when she looked back up the man was still standing there.

She had to admit, as far as hallucinations went, the man wasn’t bad to look at. His long dark hair hung just below his chin and seemed to match well with his dark, brooding eyes. Rey had a feeling that his eyes were probably the only part of him to betray his emotions, but she couldn’t explain why.

“Where are we?” The hallucination asked, glancing around at the desert surroundings, and… oh… his voice was so much deeper than she had expected it to be.

Rey turned to follow his gaze, expecting to see the same stretch of sand before her eyes, instead she found herself standing atop a balcony looking out over the skyline of a city. Rey felt her breath catch in her throat. She had never seen anything like this… at least, not with her own eyes. Rey took a few steps forward, bracing her hands on the cool metal railing. They had to be at least forty floors up. A quick glance behind her revealed a wall of glass windows that looked into what had to be an apartment. A penthouse apartment, something in her thoughts supplied helpfully.

Rey was suddenly aware of the man from before joining her at the railing, crossing his arms over one another, his gaze sweeping over a view he no doubt saw daily as if he was seeing it with new eyes.

And he was, she supposed, he was seeing it through _her_ eyes.

“Is this New York?” Rey asked, a little breathlessly, forgetting to answer his question from earlier.

The man nodded, the wind whipping his hair around his face. It was cold here, or at least, it was colder than the dry heat of Arizona, and the wind felt amazing on her flushed skin.

Almost as soon as she thought that, Rey blinked and found herself back on the rock formation. The man was still standing across from her, although she seemed to be a few inches closer to the ledge than she had been before.

“If I’m in New York, then where are you?” The man asked again. He sounded frustrated, as if he was used to getting what he wanted the first time he asked for it.

The scowl made his face much less pleasing to look at.

“Arizona,” she answered, and the look on his face eased into something more pleasant, almost a half-smile.

“I’ve never been out west,” the man says, almost to himself, “I don’t really like sand.”

Rey stepped forward, closing the space between them, every step sending up small puffs of red sand that make the man wrinkle his nose in disgust. “I’m Rey,” she offered, once they were close enough that they could shake hands, although she refrained from attempting to touch him.

“Kylo,” he returned, and so much of Rey wanted to reply that Kylo is definitely not a real name, but for some reason she got the sense that he wouldn’t take that reply very well so she bite her tongue.

She turned, needing somewhere to focus her gaze other than his dark eyes, and finds herself looking out at the New York skyline again. It’s weird… the way she feels as though she is in two places at once. When she turned back to comment on this to him, he’s gone.

\--

Rey began to wonder if maybe she was hallucinating from the heat, after a few days pass and she didn’t see him again. The headache stopped, mercifully, and Rey swore she hadn’t realized how painful it was until it fades. Every once in awhile she has uncontrollable mood swings, lashing out over the smallest problems. She nearly bit Finn’s head off after he stole one of her french fries at lunch, and was plagued with guilt over the incident for hours.

It takes her three days to realize that the emotions aren’t hers. It takes another two hours to put it together that they are his. She wonders why he seems so angry all of the time, tries to pry into his mind on purpose when she’s alone.

It isn’t as good as seeing him, but it’s enough for her just to know that he’s _real_.

\--

The second time Rey saw him, she was in the bathroom at her local gym - redoing her hair in one of the mirrors. She had just stepped out of the shower after her workout and changed back into a pair of black high-waisted jeans and a black and white striped shirt. Her hair was hanging in damp tangles around her face, so Rey reached up to pull the strands into a loose bun.

One minute, the reflection in the mirror staring back at her was her own and the next it was Kylo’s.

They stared at each other in silence for a minute, Rey’s eyes flickered over his body - taking in his bare chest, all well-defined muscles and broad shoulders. A trail of dark hair from below his belly button disappeared into the waistband of his pants, and Rey dragged her eyes back up to his face, feeling a crimson blush spreading across her face.

Kylo smirked at her, as if he knew the path that her mind was traveling down, which, given the way that she had seemed to be so in tune with his emotions, he probably did.

He opened his mouth as if to speak, but the connection was broken before he could get the words out.

\--

The third time Rey saw him she was sitting in a pub near her apartment. Finn had ditched her last minute to hang out with Poe, but Rey had already claimed a seat at the bar and she didn’t much feel like going home to an empty apartment. She was nursing the same glass of whiskey that she had ordered when she first sat down, the ice long since melted.

A sort of tension filled the air before he appeared, it must have happened the first few times, but Rey didn’t really notice it until now. She knew, even without looking over, that he would be sitting on the barstool next to her.

“Rough day?” Kylo asked, in that unexpectedly deep voice that she hasn’t heard since the first time that they saw one another.

Rey shrugged, “I just don’t really want to be alone right now, I guess,” she replied honestly, instinctively knowing that he’d be able to sense if she’s lying.

“Me either,” Kylo admitted softly, and suddenly she’s the one sitting on the stool next to her original seat, and he’s the one raising the glass of whiskey to his lips. As he swallowed, Rey felt the liquid burn the back of her throat and settle into a comfortable warmth in her stomach.

Rey watched as Kylo leaned forward and rested his arms against the bar, and they sit together in silence until he disappears and she’s back in her original stool.

\--

The fourth time that Rey saw him she stopped counting. It was late at night, and she was in bed although she wasn’t asleep. Her apartment was dark, but the air was muggy. A fan whirled in the corner, the red light staring at her like an unblinking eye. The numbers on her digital clock kept rolling past: 1 a.m., 2 a.m., 3 a.m., 4 a.m. until Rey wasn’t sure that even trying to fall asleep would be worth it. She rolled over onto her side, hoping that the change in position would help her be able to calm the restlessness she could feel churning inside of her… inside of him, and found herself staring into his dark eyes.

Rey didn't know what time it must have been, for him, in New York. Still, Rey knew without asking that he hadn’t been asleep. He was dressed in slacks and a button-down black dress shirt, and looked startlingly out of place against the backdrop off her off-white studio apartment and the nondescript grey duvet cover that was currently kicked haphazardly off the bed due to the heat.

Dark circles stood out from his fair skin, so dark they seemed almost like bruises. Rey reached out tentatively, acutely aware that neither of them had ever tried to touch the other one before, and brushed her fingers softly against the side of his face. For half a second, she thought that her fingers would pass right through him, that he would be as insubstantial as she was afraid that he would be, but they didn’t. His skin felt cool underneath her fingers, as she traced over the moles that dotted his face.

Kylo lifted his hand and reached up to brush a lock of dark hair off of her face and tucked it behind her ear.

They let the silence settle around them, and Rey found that she was content to listen to Kylo’s breathing and try to match her own to it. After a few minutes, she drifted off to sleep.

When she woke up to her alarm, barely two hours later, he was gone.

\--

Rey’s days blurred together, passing by in an unimportant string of sleep, eat, work, eat, sleep, repeat. It was only Kylo’s presence that seemed to add anything interesting to her days. On the other hand, Rey wasn’t entirely sure what Kylo did when he wasn’t sitting on the hood of a nearby car watching as she tinkered on it or sitting in the passenger seat next to her during her long drive home.

It seemed to Rey as though he appeared to her much more often than he let her appear to him. Almost as if he didn't _want_ her to see his life in New York.

Until one day, when he dropped his concentration.

The first thing that hit Rey was the smell, charred smoke and distinct Italian spices. She was in a restaurant, looking out a wall of glass windows that opened up onto a busy New York street, it seemed to be the fancy type of restaurant that Rey couldn’t afford, that she watched couples eating at on her favorite TV shows. The tables out front where empty, chairs stacked atop of them, as if the place was closed.

The loud sound of a car backfiring or a… or a gunshot… startled Rey from her musings and she turned hastily, barely glancing over the restaurant as her eyes sought the familiar figure of Kylo.

The scene in front of her _was_ something out of a TV show, but not the kind she had been imagining earlier.

Kylo was crouched low to the ground, keeping his massive frame hidden by a large table that had been tipped over onto its side. He was breathing heavily, something like fear pulsing through his veins - Rey could feel it, and his hands were clenched, white-knuckled, around an automatic pistol. Standing across the room was a heavily-tattooed man wearing a leather jacket and holding a shotgun aimed at the table Kylo was using as cover.

Rey held her breath as Kylo raised his gun and shot wildly over the cover of the table, unable to see his target. The shot missed wildly, off by at least a foot.

Rey hastily crossed the room, crouching down beside the table beside Kylo. She knew that he sensed her presence, that he could see her, but he barely acknowledged her, too busy reloading his pistol.

Rey’s tongue seemed to burn with questions: Who is he, really? Why is someone shooting at him? Why is he shooting at someone else? What the hell is his fucking job? She knew better than to ask, though. Distracting him now would only result in him getting injured, or killed, and some part deep in the back of her mind _ached_ at that prospect.

So instead, Rey peeked her head over the top of the table, watching as another of Kylo’s shots missed wildly. She studied the way his pistol was lined up over the table, studied the way the other man stood with cocky confidence, as if he knew that he had Kylo cornered and he was going to enjoy the kill… as if he would make it slow.

“A little to the left,” Rey whispered, “and aim higher.”

Kylo followed her instructions, moving the aim of the gun just so, so that this time when the gun fired the shot slammed into the middle of the man’s chest. He dropped to the ground, and Kylo turned to Rey, resting his back against the table and breathing heavily.

“Thank you,” he said, holding out a hand to her, as if to help drag both of them off the ground.

“Who the hell are you?” Rey snapped, pulling away from him and dropping the connection.

She slammed back into her own body, alone in her apartment and dropped down onto the ground. Rey brought her hands up to her face and dragged them across her eyes.

“Fuck,” she whispered into the studio apartment, and then, because it felt good, louder “fuck!”

Rey’s head was swimming, she had just killed a man. Okay, maybe she hadn’t been the one to pull the trigger, but she might as well have been. She had told Kylo where to aim, she was an accomplice to a murder. She could go to jail.

Rey forced herself to slow her breathing before she hyperventilated. She wouldn't go to jail, no one except Kylo knew that she was there. And it had been self-defense, at least, Rey hoped it had been self-defense. Kylo didn’t seem like the type of guy to whip a pistol out of his pocket and start shooting at someone in the middle of an Italian restaurant, but, of course, there was no way for Rey to be sure. Obviously, she didn’t know Kylo as well as she had thought.

Rey stood, pushing herself off the floor, and headed in the direction of her bed. She tossed herself onto the mattress, drawing her nondescript duvet cover around her, although she was perfectly aware that she wasn’t tired and it was hardly time for bed. Closing her eyes, Rey tried to lose herself in her mind, actively searching out the part that had protested against the idea of losing Kylo.

It was deep in the back, buried almost, under the weight of everything else. There was her connection to Kylo, she could feel him, although she tried to avoid a connection, she still wasn’t in the mood to talk to him about what had just happened. There was something else there too, a feeling of emptiness so intense that it brought tears to Rey’s eyes. A startled sob burst out of her chest.

Something was missing.

How had she not seen it earlier?

There were holes, where her connection with Kylo was, there were holes. As if something had been ripped out of her. Or somethings.

\--

When Kylo tried to connect with her that night, she let him, although she still didn’t want to talk about what had happened in the restaurant.

He sensed her reluctance to speak, and didn’t press the matter, even though Rey could feel the apologies and excuses sitting in his chest as if they were her own.

“Do you feel them?” She asked instead. “Earlier… I helped you because I couldn't imagine losing you. I kept trying to find out why, and… can you feel them? The… holes? I don’t know how else to explain it.”

Kylo turned over, so that they were lying on her bed facing each other, nothing but a few inches of space and her duvet cover between them. He reached up, and brushed her hair off of her face, his cool skin soft against her own. His eyes were dark, but she could see the sadness burning in them like a fire.

“Yes,” he whispered, and his voice cracked on the word. “I can feel them.”

Rey shifted closer to him on the bed, closing the space between them so that she could bury her face in his chest. She felt his hand card through her hair, the motion soothing.

They let the silence settle like a weight around them, both knowing that words were not needed to express the sorrow they could feel at losing something they had never had the chance to know.

\--

He was still there in the morning, the longest their connection had ever lasted. Her back was pressed against his chest, and his arm was thrown loosely across her stomach. Their legs were tangled together, their breathing perfectly in time.

Rey wiggled out of his grasp and grabbed a change of clothes from her dresser. She changed quickly, throwing on a white long sleeve shirt and a pair of khaki pants, keeping her feet bare and her hair loose from its usual mess of buns.

By the time she exited the bathroom, Kylo was awake and sitting up in the bed, her duvet cover draped loosely around his waist and his chest bare.

Rey felt her face flush as she looked at him, before quickly shooting her gaze up at the ceiling. “Can you put something on?” She asked, repeating to herself mentally that she watched him kill a man yesterday, she should not be feeling anything resembling attraction to him right now.

She could feel Kylo smirking, but she also felt him push himself out of bed and suddenly they were in his New York penthouse. He opened a closet and pulled a black t-shirt off of a hanger and threw it on, turning back to face her.

“Better?” He asked with a smirk, stepping closer to her.

Rey dragged her eyes back down from the ceiling to focus on his, “much,” she replied curtly. “Can we talk about how you killed someone yesterday, now?” She asked, the anger she had buried under the sadness the night before bubbling out of her.

“You were the one who didn’t want to talk about it last night,” he replied evasively.

“Well I want to talk about it now,” Rey shot back.

“I was trying to keep you out of it,” Kylo replied, shrugging his shoulders. “I didn’t want you to see me like that.”

Rey snorted, “so are you even going to try and defend yourself?”

She could feel his anger, it burned in her own chest, but there was something else too - a flicker of shame, perhaps?

“I don’t have to defend myself to you. You wouldn’t understand even if I did. The worlds we come from? They aren’t the same, Rey.” Kylo crossed his arms, and leaned against his bedroom wall.

Instinctively, Rey felt her fingers curling into fists and knew that was what he was trying to avoid by crossing his arms. “So tell me! Let me help you!”

“No one can help me,” Kylo muttered crossly, and the connection blinked out.

Rey was left standing in the middle of her one room-studio apartment staring at a bed that hadn’t been made. She turned and slammed her fist into the closest wall, the pain sharp against her knuckles. The motion was foreign to her, but familiar to the part of her that wasn’t her own, and she had the sinking suspicion that somewhere, across the country, a young man was also nursing his own bruising knuckles.

\--

He let her back in that evening, probably closer to night for him but around the time that she usually ate dinner. Of course, he obviously hadn’t meant to let her in, Rey couldn’t help but note dryly, seeing as he was currently in the shower. He had one of those expensive, all glass showers, but the heat was blasting and a thick layer of fog on the glass kept Rey from seeing anything.

Not that, you know, she was looking.

“I know you’re there,” he said, his voice low, after she failed to greet him. He raised one arm, Rey could just make out the outline through the glass, and ran it through his hair, rinsing out a layer of shampoo.

“I can’t control it,” Rey said helplessly, crossing the spacious bathroom to sit on top of the closed toilet. “You’re better at blocking than I am.”

“True,” Kylo acknowledged.

They were silent for a minute before Kylo spoke again. “I’m sorry,” he said slowly, as if he was rolling the words around in his mouth and didn’t quite like the taste. Rey wondered if he had ever said them before. “I shouldn’t have blocked you out earlier. I was upset, but you didn’t deserve that. I should have just told you the truth. You’re in my head, so you deserve to know.”

When Rey made no move to answer him, he pushed on, “I’m a lawyer. A criminal defense lawyer. A damn good one, too. A lot of guilty people have gotten off free because of me. It caused a lot of problems with my family, my parents, my uncle, they just didn’t get it. My mom works in politics and wants to make the world a better place and my dad just does whatever my mom wants, my uncle… he’s a peaceful guy. I haven’t spoken to any of them in years…” Kylo trailed off, as if realizing that he was getting off topic.

“One day, I found myself in too deep with a group of criminals that I was defending, I was swayed by their talk of power and money, and I let them convince me into joining the First Order. It’s a gang here in New York with a lot of political pull. Sometimes my work with them leads to dangerous situations like the one you saw yesterday. I’m not proud of it, and I didn’t want you to have to be a part of this,” the last part had dropped to a whisper.

Rey turned to look at him through the shower, he wasn’t looking at her, he was staring at the wall, facing the facet, and letting the water spray into his face, his dark hair hanging limp.

“Kylo,” Rey said softly, “I don’t want to lose you.”

He turned, then, and met her eyes through the glass. “You won’t,” he promised.

\--

The first time that Kylo saw Finn, Rey suddenly realized that her world was impossibly small. She was on her way to meet her friends at the bar across the street from Finn’s work before the group headed out for whatever Finn had decided the night’s events would include, usually something involving drinking and dancing, an uber taking them from one location to the next. She walked to the bar, usually, because it wasn’t far from her apartment and she didn’t want to waste the precious gas in her jeep.

Kylo had decided that he would walk with her, because it made him jumpy and uncomfortable whenever she walked around the city alone - Rey wasn’t entirely sure _why_ , since she had been walking around by herself for two years before she met him, but she let him tag along because she liked the company.

Of course, this meant, that back in New York, Kylo was walking around the city streets aimlessly which seemed to defeat the purpose of not wanting Rey to walk alone, but she bit her tongue and kept the comment to herself.

“This place is a dump,” Kylo commented, as the pair strolled up to the front door of Maz’s Tavern. “I’m sure there are much nicer places to drink in the city.”

“This place is affordable,” Rey countered, “and within walking distance.”

Kylo scoffed, but didn't make any further comments. At least, not until they walked through the front door.

“I know that guy,” he said suddenly, his eyes cutting through the crowd to latch onto the familiar figure of Finn, who was currently waving his arm at Rey, gesturing for her to join their table.

Rey waved back, before asking out of the side of her mouth so no one would see her talking to herself, “Who? Finn? Like from my memories?”

Kylo’s eyes snapped down to meet hers. “That’s Finn? The guy you’re meeting up with?” If Rey wasn’t mistaken, she felt something akin to jealousy flashing between them. “He’s dangerous.”

Rey rolled her eyes, “Finn is, like, the most easy-going guy I know. I doubt he would hurt a fly.”

Kylo reached over and grabbed Rey’s arm, stopping her abruptly in the middle of the bar. “Rey,” he said, his voice dripping with urgency, “that man used to be a member of the First Order.”

“I don’t believe you,” Rey said, mostly out of habit, trying to tug her arm away from Kylo, but he was already blasting images through their connection and into her head.

_Rey felt herself push up from behind the wooden table she was sitting at, taking in the room around her. It was a courtroom, a fairly large one. It was mostly empty, save for the jury, the judge, and the members of either side. The few people scattered around on benches must be the witnesses. A court reporter sat off to one side typing away on a laptop. She stepped out onto the floor of the courtroom, approaching the witness stand. Behind it, sat a familiar figure dressed in a plain black suit and white dress shirt._

_If she could have, Rey would have gasped aloud, but she was trapped in Kylo’s body, in Kylo’s memory, and he simply drew closer to the figure, a list of questions running through his mind for the cross-examination, but Kylo was already perfectly aware that he was going to lose this case._

_It wouldn’t be a huge loss. The man who had jumped ship, telling all of the information that he had on the First Order to the FBI had been a low-ranking grunt, and he hadn’t had the information to sink any of the true leaders of the First Order: Snoke, Hux. Hell, he didn't even have enough ammunition to bring Kylo down. Still, losing Phasma would hurt, and Snoke would be pissed as hell._

_Kylo felt a jolt of fear race down his spine as he speculated about what Snoke would do to him for losing the case. Still, it was more Hux’s fault than his own. The fucking red-head should keep a better eye on his new hires._

_Kylo looked back up at the figure behind the witness stand. His code-name within the First Order had been FN. They usually used code-names. To avoid shit like this when others got caught._

_Kylo cleared his throat and_

and Rey was forced out of the memory.

“Believe me now?” Kylo asked, his voice so low it was practically a growl, “whoever that man is, his name certainly isn’t Finn. He vanished after the trial. Our leader tried to look for him, and believe me, if he ever finds him there is going to be hell to pay. It’s dangerous for you to be associated with him.”

Rey felt her arms shaking, and she quickly pulled out her phone and held it to her ear, giving Finn a ‘1-minute’ signal with her finger from across the room before letting Kylo lead her over to the closest wall.

“I’ve known Finn for just under two years, he was my first friend in the city. I never… I never thought…” she trailed off, hugging her arms around her chest, “it was all a lie?” Her voice rose at the end, making the statement into a question.

Kylo reached out for her and pulled her into his chest, wrapping his arms around her as if he could shield her from the outside world.

“FN betrayed the First Order about three years ago, a damn good lawyer named Poe Dameron worked with the FBI to get him off without any charges. At least, I’m pretty sure that’s what happened. But after that, the trail went dead. FN vanished, and Dameron quit his job not long after. Annoyed the shit out of Hux, which meant I wasn’t too inclined to help look for them.”

As if Kylo’s words had summoned him, Poe emerged from the bar’s bathroom, rejoining Finn and their other friends, one of his arms draped across Finn’s shoulders.

Rey let out a breath she hadn’t realized she had been holding, “so you’re not going to turn them in? I know that they lied to me, but they’re my friends. They’re my family.”

Kylo’s arms stiffened around her, but she could feel him shaking his head. “No, I’m not going to turn them in. If Hux wants to find them, he can do his own dirty work. Anyway, where would I say I got the information? From a girl who I talk to in my head? They would have me committed.”

Rey let out a soft chuckle. “Thank you. For not turning them in.” She paused a minute, slowly extracting herself from his arms before looking up to meet his gaze. “That’s the most you’ve ever let yourself talk about your job, complaining about your co-workers,” she stopped to grin at him before adding, “it’s almost like you’re normal.”

Kylo let out a sharp bark of laughter, looking almost as startled by it as she was, “have fun tonight,” he said, “I think I’ll just leave you and your friends to it.”

He cut the connection and disappeared from view, so Rey pretended to hang up her cell phone and crossed the room to join her friends.

She plastered a smile onto her face and pretended that she wasn’t currently picturing Finn standing behind the witness stand in a New York courtroom.

\--

She was loading up her jeep with equipment to go climbing a few days later when Kylo appeared next to her and took the backpack out of her hands to carry it for her.

“Go on a date with me,” he said suddenly.

If Rey had still been holding her backpack she would have dropped it. “I’m sorry?” She asked, studying him.

“Go on a date with me,” Kylo repeated, slowly this time.

“I can’t go on a date with you,” Rey replied automatically, “You live in my head.”

Kylo snorted, “You can go on a date with me if you want to.” He suddenly blushed, a faint red blossoming across his cheeks. “Do you want to?”

Rey stopped in her tracks, looking up into his dark eyes and considered the idea. It felt kind of… inevitable, to be honest. They were so in-tune to one-another’s emotions, and they were in each other’s thoughts more often than they weren't. It would be nearly impossible to date anyone else without it feeling like a betrayal, and not only that, but the idea of Kylo being with anyone else was enough to make Rey bristle.

His eyes swept over her, picking through her thoughts like he was sorting a pile of important papers. “So you do want to go on a date with me,” he said, grinning at her. It made his face look years younger.

“How can we go on a date? It will look weird if we’re at two different restaurants talking to ourselves,” Rey said, shoving her hands in her pockets.

“Easy,” Kylo replied, “I’ll make you dinner at my apartment. No one will be able to stare.”

“You can cook?” Rey asked with a raised eyebrow, “I was under the impression you lived on take-away.”

“I can cook...” Kylo pouted, “... pasta, anyway.”

Rey bounced over to his side, letting him lift one of his arms and tuck her against him. He was warm against her, even through the layers of clothing. “Okay,” she said with a smile, “let’s have dinner.”

\--

It was weird getting ready for a date when all Rey would be doing was sitting around her own house. Or at least, that was all her body would be doing. She scanned over her closet once more, as if begging something to jump out at her and start screaming “wear me” but nothing did.

She thought about easing open the connection with Kylo and asking what he thought she should wear, but he had been blocking her out all morning in an effort to keep their dinner a surprise, and she didn't really want to ruin it now.

Groaning in frustration, Rey reached over towards her nightstand and scooped up her phone, face-timing the only person she could think of to help.

“Rose, I have a date tonight and I don't know what to wear,” Rey blurted out, as soon as the other girl had answered the call.

Okay, so Rose was technically more Finn’s friend than Rey’s, but she was the only other girl in their friend group and that had to count for something. Right?

“You have a date?” Rose squealed, “how is this the first I'm hearing about it? Normally Finn would have talked my ear off about it!”

Rey felt a blush creep across her face. Finn couldn't have talked to Rose about it because Finn didn't know. She hadn't wanted to let any names slip lest Finn or Poe recognize it from their days back with the First Order.

“It was kind of last minute,” Rey finally settled on, trying to be evasive without being obvious about it.

“This is so exciting,” Rose said dreamily, “you haven't been on a date in forever.”

The few dates that Rey had been on had mostly been blind set-ups from her friends that had all ended in failures, but Rey decided not to remind her friend of this. Instead, she flipped the camera around so that it was aimed at her closet.

“So what do I wear?” She asked again, suddenly frustrated at the lack of clothing crammed into her tiny closet.

“Well what kind of date is it? Location is important when determining what you want to wear,” Rose replied thoughtfully.

“I’m going to his apartment, he’s making me dinner,” Rey answered, glad she knew what to say for once.

Rose raised an eyebrow, “you’re going to his apartment on a first date? At least, I'm assuming it's a first date since none of your friends know about this mystery man. That's a pretty bold move.”

“Well we’ve known each other for awhile,” Rey said, knowing that her entire face was probably splotchy and red.

Rose hummed, as if she didn't quite believe Rey. “For dinner at his apartment I would say that you should go with the black cocktail dress you bought for my sister’s art opening a few months ago, the silver chunky necklace that Finn got you for your birthday, and the pair of tall black boots that you bought when they were marked down to half price over the summer.”

“You are a lifesaver!” Rey exclaimed, moving to pull out the clothing pieces that Rose had mentions.

“And make sure to wear your sexy underwear,” Rose added with a chuckle before quickly ending the call.

Rey tossed her phone onto her bed, before rolling her eyes.

Still, she did change into a pair of black lace panties and the matching bra before squeezing into the black cocktail dress and using her bathroom mirror to make sure she got the zipper all the way up in the back.

Rey studied her appearance in the mirror, reaching up to pull her short brown hair loose from the messy bun it had been in to let it fall loose around her shoulders. She brushed her hands through it a few times, smoothing the stray strands, before returning to her main room to grab the pair of chunky black boots to complete her look.

Now, all she had to do was wait.

\--

Kylo finally let his walls down at around five, and the minute that he did, Rey closed the gap between them and stepped into his apartment. He was standing in front of his front door, so Rey appeared in the entryway with him, almost as if he had just let her in.

She glanced around the apartment, having only seen it in pieces before. The entryway opened into a spacious living area, which contained a large black leather couch and his plasma flat screen TV. The far wall was nothing but a row of glass windows that opened out first to a balcony and then to the cityscape beyond. A hallway to Rey’s left led down to Kylo’s master bedroom, walk-in closet, and master bathroom - as well as the guest bedroom and bathroom. To her right, the living room bled into a dining room whose table was long enough to seat at least eight comfortably. Across from the dining room was the most beautiful kitchen Rey had ever seen (no doubt wasted on Kylo).

And of course, there was the man, himself. Kylo was smiling at her, no doubt reading her emotions for her opinion on his apartment.

He looked handsome, dressed in a pair of dark jeans and a button-down black dress-shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. His hair was freshly washed and hung neatly down almost to his shoulders. As she scanned him over, she could feel him doing the same to her.

“You look nice,” he said, the first to break the silence. “Beautiful, I mean,” he corrected, the tips of his ears turning pink.

Now it was Rey’s turn to blush. “You do too. Look handsome.”

Rey slipped off her chunky black boots, knowing that Kylo wouldn’t be the type to want shoes in his apartment and left them by the door, trailing after him, barefoot, as he lead her towards the kitchen.

The kitchen was wide and open, with black granite countertops that were currently covered in cutting boards, half-chopped vegetables, and an open box of pasta noodles. A pot of water was boiling on the stove, and a smaller pot of sauce was bubbling. The red light blinked on the oven, warning them that it was pre-heating. Kylo moved to return to what he had been doing before she arrived, chopping vegetables for their salad. Following him into the kitchen, Rey hopped up onto the mostly unused kitchen island, letting her legs swing back and forth.

Kylo quickly sliced the rest of the vegetables, tossing them into a large bowl filled with salad greens, before he crossed the room and stood in front of her.

At this height, Rey found that her face was level with Kylo’s own, and she felt a slight thrill at the fact.

“Your sauce is going to burn,” she told him, glancing at it from the corner of her eye.

“It’s fine,” Kylo replied, obviously distracted. His gaze flickered down to her lips, and Rey felt the beginning fluttering of desire in her abdomen.

She reached up, wrapping her arms around his neck to draw him closer to her, his flesh feeling just as warm and real to her as if she really was in the kitchen in New York with him.

Kylo braced himself with his arms on either side of her, dropping his head slightly to press their foreheads together.

“Rey?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I kiss you?”

\--

The first time Kylo’s lips met hers, Rey felt like her world exploded. Every sensation was amplified, their lips moving against one another until Rey couldn't tell which mouth was hers and which was Kylo’s. It felt as though every hair on her body was standing on edge, her heart pounded against her chest, she saw stars behind her closed eyelids.

Kylo slid his hands up to wrap around her waist, and Rey retaliated by dragging her legs up to settle them on his hips.

When he finally removed his lips from hers, Rey couldn't help the whimper that escaped her. She wanted his lips back on hers, wanted to continue to experience the whirlwind of being caught in one another’s emotions thoughts bodies while they were locked together.

She wanted…

Kylo’s lips didn't go far, they trailed sloppy kisses down her chin to her neck, where he nipped with his teeth before using his tongue to soothe the bite.

Rey slid her hands up the front of his chest, shoving them underneath his black dress shirt, and let her fingers explore the expanse of smooth skin and muscle.

Kylo, apparently satisfied with the love mark he created, returned his attention to her lips, and the taste of his peppermint toothpaste flooded her senses. She could taste her own pomegranate chapstick with his tongue, the blending of flavors should have been disgusting, but was actually inviting.

Kylo’s took a step backwards, away from the kitchen island, dragging Rey’s body with him so that he was completely supporting her. In response, Rey reached back up to tighten her grip around his neck, pulling herself even closer to him.

She trusted his strength, she knew that he wouldn't drop her.

She already sensed what he was thinking in his mind before he could fully form the thought, and she sent her complete and total agreement towards him through their connection.

While keeping her tight against him with one arm, Kylo freed the other to turn off the stove, ignoring the half-cooked meal in favor of carrying Rey to bed.

\--

It was like nothing Rey had ever experienced. Her own pleasure built slowly, burning like a steady and constant fire, but Kylo’s washed over her in waves - drowning her in the intoxicating feeling of passion. The sensation of both giving and taking pleasure at once, the feel of Kylo’s mouth between her thighs, the exact moment both their minds and their bodies joined together as one.

There were no words.

It was the creation of worlds, the expansion of the cosmos, the last burst of light from a dying star.

It was both an ending and a beginning.

\--

In the end, they never do have dinner, a fact neither Rey nor Kylo seemed much bothered by. They fell asleep in each other's arms and woke up a few hours later, tired and sore and hungry but deliriously happy.

Kylo ordered pizza, instead, and they ate it curled up in his bed while Netflix played some movie neither of them were paying attention to.

It's a pretty perfect first date, in Rey’s opinion.

(And okay normally she wouldn't sleep with a guy on the first date, but Kylo isn't just some guy. He shares a mental connection to her, they know each other’s every thought. It's different.)

\--

Rey returned to her own apartment regretfully, forced to confront the realities of a Monday morning. Both she and Kylo had to work, so he pressed one last kiss to her lips and Rey turned around to slide out of her own bed. She had no idea what her body must have looked like while her mind was with Kylo, and doesn't really want to think about it, but she can't resist peaking in the mirror to see if the love mark was actually on her neck, to see if some part of him had come back with her.

It isn’t though, further proof that all of this only exists in her head, and Rey tried not to let it disappoint her.

She picked up her phone from where she had left it, startled to see several missed Facetimes from Rose and a few texts from both Finn and Poe demanding for more information about this mystery man.

She shot the guys a quick text in their group chat saying she’ll explain everything over dinner tonight (giving her a few hours to come up with a plausible cover story… hopefully). Then, she reluctantly pressed the call button to let Rose know that she was alive and well.

Rose answered on the first ring.

“Oh thank god, you’re alive. I thought maybe your date killed you and chopped you up or something after I never heard from you,” Rose gushed quickly. “Wait a minute… isn't that the outfit I picked out for you? Rey - were you with this guy all weekend?”

Rey blushed, feeling a jolt of smugness from Kylo through their bond. “... yes,” she admitted, biting her lip.

“I so owe Finn twenty bucks,” Rose muttered, before adding more loudly, “so when do we get to meet him?”

“I don't know,” Rey replied honestly, “it’s kind of new.”

“And kind of serious,” Rose added with a chuckle. “He must be pretty handsome.”

Rey felt Kylo stiffen at the other end of their bond, as if he was waiting to see what she would say. “Oh he is,” she confirmed, “he’s hot as hell.”

The smile that light up her face wasn’t entirely her own.

\--

The work day passed in a breeze, Rey conversing silently with Kylo as he helped her come up with a plausible cover story to tell to Finn and Poe. The idea of lying to her friends doesn't really sit well with Rey, but telling the truth is an equally unacceptable option. Not only would Finn, and Poe, undoubtedly recognise Kylo’s name from their interactions with the First Order, but they would probably try to lock her up if she explained that no one could see Kylo except for her, even when he was standing in a room with them.

“It could be a long distance issue,” Kylo supplied, “that would be a reason they couldn’t meet me. It will at least buy you time.”

“But Rose knows I spent the weekend with you, it’s not like I’m rolling in money to drop on plane tickets,” Rey said, as she rolled out from underneath the car she was tinkering with.

“So not the far of a distance, Rose also knows you spent the whole weekend with me - something unusual for a first date. We can work that to our advantage. I live far enough away that you drove up to see me, close enough for a weekend trip, but too far to see each other all the time. Tell them I live outside of Albuquerque, it’s about a six hour drive from your apartment outside of Phoenix. Do-able, but long.” In his own world, Kylo was sitting at his desk in his office doing paperwork, but so far most of his attention had been focused on Rey.

“That makes sense,” Rey nodded, “I like it. How did we meet?”

“Online?” Kylo offered.

“I have a better idea,” Rey said, “you were on your way to a business meeting in San Diego when your car broke down. So you stopped by the shop and I fixed your car and then we decided that we couldn't live without one another.”

“You can’t live without me?” Kylo asked, and Rey could feel him smirking through their bond.

“Shut up,” she replied half-heartedly.

“Make me,” he shot back, which resulted in the two of them abandoning their work completely in favor of finding somewhere they would each be uninterrupted.

“I’m supposed to be working,” Kylo groaned against her mouth.

“So am I,” Rey replied, as she pulled his dress shirt out of his pants and worked on opening the buttons.

“Having you in my head is an awful distraction.”

Rey grinned, “I could say the same about you.”

\--

By the time Rey parked her car in front of the tiny pancake house that she and Finn used to haunt on a regular basis when they first met, Kylo had returned home from work and was ordering Chinese take-out for dinner.

“Chow mein does not go with pancakes,” Rey muttered, feeling Kylo’s answering laugh echo throughout her chest.

The bell hanging over the door tinkled cheerfully as Rey let it slam behind her, making a beeline for the usual booth she and her friends sat in, the booth where Finn and Poe were already sitting.

She waved at her friends, crossing the room to join them quickly, and slid into the leather booth across from them. Three syrup-sticky menus were already sitting on the table, as well as three cups of lukewarm coffee.

“Long time no see,” Poe greeted, raising his eyebrows over dramatically.

Finn reached across the table to give Rey a brief hug, before leaning back into Poe’s side.

On her own side of the table, Rey subtly slid over so that there was room for Kylo to squeeze onto the bench next to her.

“I know, I know, and I’m sorry about that,” Rey apologized, “I’ve just been really busy.”

“Yeah, Rose told us all about that,” Finn teased. “Apparently you’re being pretty evasive about this new guy that you’re dating.”

Rey fidgeted uncomfortably in her seat, hating the fact that the next words out of her mouth would be a lie. “Well it’s just really new, and he lives out by Albuquerque so we’re still trying to figure out how we want to make it work…” she trailed off, watching as Finn and Poe seemed to have an entire conversation with just their eyebrows.

“How did you meet,” Finn asked at last, “if he lives out by Alburquerque - that’s at least six hours away.”

This, at least, she had an answer to. “He was driving to a business meeting out in San Diego when his car broke down, he brought it to the shop and we just really hit it off.”

Finn nodded, looking appeased, and underneath the table Kylo rested a comforting hand on her leg.

“So what’s his name? This mysterious man of yours?”

“Oh, his name is Ky… Kyle,” Rey settled on, cursing herself silently for almost revealing his real, rather distinct, name.

Kylo stifled a snort next to her, “do I look like a Kyle to you?” He asked, arching a brow.

Well, I couldn’t exactly say that your name is Kylo, now, could I? Rey shot towards him mentally, trying to keep her face neutral.

“Do you have a picture,” Poe asked, leaning forward in the seat, “Rose said that you referred to him as ‘hot as hell’ and I feel like physical proof is needed.”

Rey felt Kylo’s back straighten. No, a picture would be too revealing. Still, a normal girlfriend would have a picture…

“We were a little too busy to take a selfie, Poe,” Rey said, hating the way her face flushed bright red.

Finn started laughing, at her embarrassment no doubt, “Rose was right,” he said, in between bursts of laughter, “she does owe me twenty bucks.”

\--

The rest of the dinner passed mostly uneventfully, with Finn and Poe easing up on their teasing. Unfortunately, Kylo also vanished half-way through, muttering something about a work emergency and blocking her off. A block of ice settled in the center of Rey’s chest. She knew what he did for a living, and the fact that he didn’t want her to see what was happening was not a good sign.

She probed at the mental barrier, trying to find a chink in his defenses that she could take advantage of, but there was nothing. He was too good at keeping her out.

She spent the second half of the dinner trying to make small talk while mentally trying to connect with Kylo, and she left as soon as it was socially acceptable to return to the peace and quiet of her own apartment.

She tossed herself onto her bed, sitting cross-legged and closed her eyes, focusing all of her energy on her link to Kylo.

The bond was silent.

\--

When he reconnected in the morning, Rey was too relieved to be mad, throwing herself into his arms and pressing her face into his chest.

\--

He told her why, later.

It was night for him, and he whispered the secrets into the cover of darkness. He told her about the evidence he’s been storing up, about the research he’d done into what happened to Finn and why the First Order can’t find him, he told her about his boss, a man names Snoke, and how Kylo was sick of doing the dirty work for him.

He told her about his family, about how he fought against them for so long and how he thought all he wanted was to be free of them. He told her about how he missed them, now.

He told her his plan, and Rey didn’t want to let the hope that was rising in her chest to take over, but it was a good plan.

\--

Rey sat with him as he turned himself in, she watched with wide hazel eyes as Kylo handed the stack of paperwork over to the Feds detailing everything he had done for the First Order, she watched as he is sat down in an office across from a woman named Amilyn Holdo.

She listened to words that flew over her head, her attention unable to focus on them, so instead she focused on watching the expressions flicker across Kylo’s face.

Confusion, frustration, acceptance.

He managed to cut a deal. He would go to the witness stand for the FBI, he would help them bring Snoke down, in exchange for a chance at a new life.

It’s a good deal. The one he had been hoping for.

The hope in Rey’s chest took on a life of its own.

\--

The trial was a mass of confusion and fear. She sat in the audience and watched as Kylo mounted the steps to the witness stand. She prayed under her breath and hoped that the Feds knew what they were doing, that Kylo knew what he was doing.

He was about to piss off a lot of very powerful, very dangerous people.

He told the court everything he knew, confessing to his own crimes as well as reporting the crimes of others.

Rey didn't know if it will be enough to put Snoke away, to keep Kylo safe, but Holdo seemed to think that the result were promising, and they sent a team with Kylo to his apartment to pack up some of his things that he wants to keep.

“Where will they send you?” Rey whispered to him, as she sealed a box full of books shut.

“I don’t know,” Kylo said, “but I hope it’s out West.”

She grinned at him, her smile bright enough to light up the room.

\--

When her phone rang with a call from an unknown number, Rey almost didn’t answer it, but something in her gut told her that she should, so she swiped her fingers across the screen and brought the phone up to her ear.

“Hello?” She asked.

“Rey,” a familiar voice said, and her heart leapt into her throat. Somehow, hearing his voice in person was drastically better than hearing it in her head.

“Hi,” she said, a bit stupidly, blinking tears out of her eyes, “you’re real.”

“Of course I’m real,” Kylo said with a laugh. “I’m at a payphone at the airport, the FBI agents have finally decided what to do with me. They’re putting me in witness protection and sending me to Seattle to live the rest of my days in peace.”

“Seattle,” Rey echoed, her heart clenching in her chest. A part of her had been hoping they would stick him where they had stuck Finn. Seattle was still so far.

“Rey,” he said again, and Rey could see him standing at the payphone in the airport, the phone clutched in one white-knuckled hand what the other was braced against the top of the machine. “Come with me?”

“What?” She breathed, wanting to be sure she had heard him correctly.

“Come with me… to Seattle. You would like it there. It’s green all of the time, and you can see the ocean. You always dream about the ocean. Just… come with me.” His voice was low, a little breathless, and she could feel his heart pounding against her chest.

He was afraid she would say no.

“Okay,” she answered, a smile carving it’s way onto her face.

He laughed, the sound unexpectedly free. She never heard him sound like that before, “okay,” he repeated. He reached up and brushed his hand across the side of her face, tangling his fingers in her hair.

The phone call disconnected before they do, and she reached up to press a soft kiss to his lips. He doesn’t move, doesn’t kiss her back because people are watching, but it’s enough.

\--

Her flight to Seattle left two days after his arrived, giving him enough time to set up the apartment that the Feds had provided for him and find a job working at the small family law office in town.

She felt bad about leaving Finn and Poe and Rose, but Finn and Poe had each other, and Rose had her sister.

And Rey had Kylo.

Or rather, Ben, as that was both his real name and the name the FBI had given him for his new identity.

He met her by the airport, holding a sign with her name on it, and she dropped her luggage to throw herself into his arms. He felt warm underneath her, flesh and blood and bone and he was here and she was here and it was unbelievably better in real life than it had been in her head.

Kylo pulled back, setting her on her feet so that he could press a searing kiss to her lips.

That was even better in person, too, if it was at all possible.

“Hello,” he said with a smile, as he pulled back to wrap an arm around her and crush her to his side.

“Hi,” Rey replied, scooping her bags off from the ground to let him lead her in the direction of his car so that he could take her home.

She could feel his smile lighting up her face at the thought, he liked the fact that she considered wherever he was to be home.

“I love you,” she said suddenly, feeling the way his chest ached in response.

“I love you too,” Kylo said, dropping a kiss to the top of her head.

And in that moment, everything felt undeniably _right_.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Glossary | References
> 
> In Sense8 canon, a cluster is a group of sensates (the people who are psychically connected to one another) that can have as little as two members or an many as ten to twelve. Clusters, are groups of sensates. They can be as small as 2 or 3 or as big as 10 to 12. Members of a cluster are born on the same day at the same moment. A cluster has to be reborn by another sensate activating their innate connection to each other, called birthing, this results in extremely painful headaches that vanish once the birthing is complete. 
> 
> Once established, the bond between the sensates within a cluster builds up over time, to the point where members of the cluster can share and visit each other easily and understand one another despite speaking in different languages. Each Sensate within the cluster can be considered one part of a larger whole. Sensates communicate with other sensates telepathically (mind to mind) but often speak out loud when visiting another sensate and appear to be talking to nothing by outside observers. However, sensates can learn to communicate and interact with each other purely in their minds without speaking.
> 
> The members of a cluster are often very different from one another in terms of race, gender, sexuality and country of birth. The connection of a cluster over time becomes incredibly intuitive, even functioning on a subconscious level, to the point where a sensate who finds themselves in emotional turmoil will often instinctively visit and share with members of their cluster who can offer a perspective or life experience that can help them.
> 
> Sensates within a cluster are mentally and emotionally connected. At first, the connection manifests as sensory input, where one sensate experiences something with one or more of their senses something another sensate within their cluster is experiencing at that same moment. Gradually, their link strengthens to the point where they feel each other's thoughts and emotions (at times even memories). Visiting happens when sensates mentally communicate with each other. Sensates are seemingly mentally transported to each others' locations and experience everything the other feels within that environment. Visiting often works hand-in-hand with a sensate's psychic link; utilizing both, sensates can access any of the five senses through a fellow sensate, allowing them to perceive the world around them through another sensate's eyes. This also includes physical contact, such as with one another. 
> 
> (This information can all be found here: http://sense8.wikia.com/wiki/Sensate ) 
> 
> Additionally, the sense of loss that both Kylo and Rey feel in the back of their minds are the deaths of others who would have potentially been in their cluster if all had survived to adulthood. This was both inspired by details in the show as well as an amazing Gilmore Girls Sense8 au by missgoalie75 on AO3 called "doors unlocked and open" that I highly recommend.


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